This is the Wrong World!

by esliesma

Original Action Fantasy Romance Anti-Hero Lead Female Lead LitRPG Magic School Life Slice of Life Strong Lead Summoned Hero

It's not her fault she was born with a face that screams arrogance and villainy! Maybe, she should have controlled her temper and not called the Goddess a slut. But after being cursed, ten years later, Izo finally defeats the Demon King and is sent home. Except there is one small problem, it's the wrong world!

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Author
esliesma

esliesma

Overlord-Sama

Achievements
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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
*Prologue - Demon King ago
* Chapter 1 – News ago
* Chapter 2 – Rise ago
* Chapter 3 – And Shine ago
* Chapter 4 – Wrap up ago
* Chapter 5 – Collision ago
* Chapter 6 – Registration ago
* Chapter 7 – Ophidian Wilderness ago
* Chapter 7.2 – Breakfast is ready ago
Chapter 8 – Sky Knights ago
* Chapter 9 – Egg ago
* Chapter 10 - Ick ago
* Chapter 11 – Research ago
* Chapter 11.2 – Out of Breath ago
* Chapter 12 – Research ago
* Chapter 12.2 – Buyer ago
* Chapter 12.3 – Midnight Visit ago
* Chapter 12.4 – Construction ago
* Chapter 13 – Bingo ago
* Chapter 13.2 – Hiring Hall ago
* Chapter 13.3 – Contract ago
* Chapter 13.4 – Opinion ago
* Chapter 14 – Shopping ago
* Chapter 14.2 – Brew ago
* Chapter 14.3 – Girl’s night out ago
* Chapter 15 – Hire ago
* Chapter 15.2 – Report ago
* Chapter 16 – Plasma Plains ago
* Chapter 16.2 – Brawl ago
* Chapter 16.3 – Jackpot ago
* Chapter 16.4– Guild Headquarters ago
* Chapter 17– Therapy Session ago
* Chapter 17.2– Items ago
* Chapter 17.3 – First Impressions ago
* Chapter 17.4 – Country Club ago
* Chapter 17.5 – Dinner? ago
* Chapter 18 – Counter Attack ago
* Chapter 18.2 – Offer ago
* Chapter 18.3 – Ripples ago
* Chapter 18.4 – Bet ago
* Chapter 19 – Starting a Fire ago
* Chapter 19.2 - Tour ago
* Chapter 19.3 – End of the day ago
* Chapter 19.4 – Laser Tag ago
* Chapter 19.5 – Report ago
* Chapter 20 – Grand Opening ago
* Chapter 20.2 – Grand Opening Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 20.3 – Grand Opening Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 20.4 – Grand Opening Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 20.5 – Grand Opening Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 21 – Emerald City Ball ago
* Chapter 21.2 – Emerald City Ball Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 21.3 – Emerald City Ball Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 21.4 – Emerald City Ball Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 21.5 – Emerald City Ball Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 21.6 – Emerald City Ball Ⅵ ago
* Chapter 22 –Felicitations! ago
* Chapter 22.2 –Felicitations Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 22.3 –Felicitations Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 22.4 –Felicitations Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 22.5 –Felicitations Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 23 – The Call ago
* Chapter 23.2 – The Call Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 23.3 – The Call Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 23.4 – The Call Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 23.5 – The Call Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 24 – The Raid ago
* Chapter 24.2 – The Raid Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 24.3 – The Raid Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 24.4 – The Raid Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 24.5 – The Raid Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 25 – The Dungeon ago
* Chapter 25.2 – The Dungeon Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 25.3 – The Dungeon Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 25.4 – The Dungeon Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 25.5 – The Dungeon Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 25.6 – The Dungeon Ⅵ ago
* Chapter 26 – The Venture ago
* Chapter 26.2 – The Venture Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 26.3 – The Venture Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 26.4 – The Venture Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 26.5 – The Venture Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 27 – The Day ago
* Chapter 27.2 – The Day Ⅱ ago
* Chapter 27.3 – The Day Ⅲ ago
* Chapter 27.4 – The Day Ⅳ ago
* Chapter 27.5 – The Day Ⅴ ago
* Chapter 28 – The Gods ago
Reviews

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Jazehiah
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A good take on LITRPG urban fantasy

What I like most about this story is that it takes cliches and applies common sense. It's rare to see an author pull that off when writing about a world of stat screens and magic. The protaganist (Izo) is rather bitter, but is very easy to sympathize with, especially given the circumstances, and the world she lives in feels organic. The LITRPG elements are subtle, and serve as helpful reminders rather than "end all be all" measures of progress.

My only issue, is that sometimes Izo's abilities seem a bit inconsistent, but most of that can be explained away or blamed on circumstances. It's a little hard to guage a character's prowess without a baseline so I'll give it a pass.

Insignia
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Note that as of Oct. 17 2017 this work has been edited - therefor this review is out-dated. Take what is written here with a grain of salt.

I'll try to keep this brief, but I doubt I'll be able to, as there're more than a couple of issues with this work. Also, a note in advance: while this ‘review’ (in quotes because it’s more akin to a rant) focuses on the negative points, I'm not trying to be cruel. I believe that some solid criticism highlighting flaws can be used as a tool by the Author, whereas empty compliments (which, cynical as I am, are all I am capable of in this case) cannot. Keep that in mind.

Through dissecting the synopsis, we readers are to expect a tragic heroine - one who is misunderstood due to her physical appearance and cursed by a goddess, yet bore the burden of defeating the Demon King regardless... Only to find that the world she was transferred to after accomplishing the above feat wasn't her own.

Reading through the first couple of chapters (spoiler alert, I guess), it's revealed that she and her class were all transported to a world with a Demon King and tasked to defeat it. Izo - the protagonist of this story - wasn't the 'Hero', but more of a side character. The only reason she had to step up and slay the Demon King was because the Goddess decided to get frisky with the actual Hero, leading to the death of basically every other classmate in his absence.

Out of bitterness for her friend(s) being killed, Izo insulted the Goddess and was cursed for it, becoming hated by the vast majority of the world and losing much of her strength (which was a bit counterproductive on the Goddess' part, but I digress).

Still, Izo remained determined to return to her world, and went through hell and back to attain the power necessary to defeat the Demon King. When she finally succeeded, she was transported out of the world where she suffered, fought, bled, cried, and cursed for 10 years... Only to arrive in an 'alternate' world - one where Magic and Technology were developed equally. The 'Izo' and her classmates of said world were abducted by a Murderer rather than a Goddess, and were killed rather than transported to another world.

It sounds like a great premise to set up on, right? Surely the heroine of this tale is an unparalleled badass with a large number of mental and physical traumas to tackle, making room for character development. Surely she wouldn't be able to seamlessly fit into the ‘wrong world’ - one both strange and familiar - without some level of difficulty. Surely she would stick to her guns and try to find a way to get back to her true home over the '40' chapters that are currently available. 

But no. Using 'Memory Spells' Izo adjusts to the world all too easily, and somehow has zero issues interacting with other people despite the ten years of being alienated and/or met with hostility - with the exclusion of her sour attitude towards Elves, the reason for which is never elaborated upon beyond a paragraph or two. Furthermore, that drive to go back to her original world somehow ceases to exist, and she starts using her worried alternate-world parents as coin purses to start up an Auction House while occasionally going out as an Adventurer to solve problems that happen to pop up without proper exposition, only to get no recognition for her efforts.

And know this, reader, those are only the problems that have to do with the plot and setting. They're big problems, but with the proper execution, it wouldn't matter. With proper elaboration of events and character development around the protagonist they wouldn't be so off-putting. But unfortunately, there're more problems - ones related to structure, grammar, and 'flow' - that have yet to be spoken about.

The first of these problems has to do with the Author's chosen tense: Third-Person Present. The norm for tenses is 'Third-Person Past', 'First-Person Present', and 'First-Person Past', and while it's alright to go to different tenses... There’s a reason why the above three are used more often: it’s harder to mess up in them, and even if you do, your readers should understand the tense well enough to patch any errors. Thus, while Third-Person Present could work... It didn’t in this case.

Because of the amount of grammatical/phrasing errors, I had to change a lot of what I read in my head. The problem with that is that one’s mind falls back on familiar things when trying to correct errors, and mine just happened to look towards First-Person Present or First-Person Past. This completely natural psychological function then led to even more errors, which I would then have to mentally dabble on... It was exhausting (and would probably be even more so for ESL readers), but at least it allowed me to glim over a certain First/Third-Person Present paragraph using 'Madam' to identify Izo while retaining the Third-Person's barring of 'I'  (if it was First-Person it would have been coming from Izo's Maid, but it wasn't, thus the issue).

And on that note comes the second and third issues: awkward snippets of characters other than the protagonist, and a lack of 'show, don't tell'.

The former problem arises due to the fact that practically every character seems to be the same (minus some minor quirks). They mention other characters' names repetitively rather than using 'you' or 'they' - even if they've literally said their name in the previous sentence - making them seem overly polite. They're also stale, enough so that I stopped and thought to myself 'a real person wouldn't talk/act/respond like that,' on numerous occasions. While not all characters are so exceedingly simple, the vast majority of them are, and that’s a problem.

The latter problem is, unfortunately, very common among literary works, but requires mention nonetheless. I don't want to read actions that would be at home on a highschool script. If someone nods, what is the reason for it? What subtle actions and reactions are present upon being in the presence of their dialogue? People don't just do one thing at a time, and real groups don't just stand around and do nothing when someone does/says something. People also don’t just do things for the sake of doing them - unless they’re supposed to be animals in skin-suits, of course.

I'm not asking for every moment to be a work of art, as that would take far too long to read... But I shouldn't be able to skim over entire paragraphs of dialogue and see the same scene as someone who reads it all in detail. I should miss things - important things, interesting things, beautiful things.

Finally, we come to Grammar. We aren't all good at it, and I know better than to expect perfection... But there were an excessively large number of cases where I had to rearrange words to make them work, or move commas forward/back to get a satisfactory pause. Grammar affects the flow of dialogue, and that flow, in this case, is akin to a trickling river grinding to a halt due to a rockslide. I don't want to draw any conclusions on the Author's editing, but I can remember at least two instances off the top of my head where snippets of sentences/words were littered about in the middle of a paragraph for no foreseeable reason - something that wouldn't happen if the chapter was simply read over.

 

So there you have it: a list of problems that plague this work (although it definitely doesn't include all of them), all of which you'll encounter if you choose to read it.

If you can't handle the above: stay away. If you can: please, read on. Although the execution of the supposed premise has been less than stellar thus far, a hint of potential remains, and it may be worth your while to stick around.

FunkyKatana
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So far this looks pretty awesome, hopefully they make some good progress on this, will be fun to read

Rapacity
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MC is set up to have a tragic past but then acts like a generic JP light novel character sent in another world , with her being incredibly OP . The story then becomes slice of life in style where nothing in this world demonstrates a challenge for the MC . The story fails for me to serve as wish fulfilment or be funny tale due to the tragedy of the MC’s past but it also doesn’t act as a serious piece. I just don't really understand the direction the author is taking it in.

Christine Washington
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This seems really promising. Aside from the cheesy prologue, the first two chapters are pretty interesting. Will update this as the story progresses.

magpie
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Too Sane To Be Evil

 Our Protagonist, Izo, is too sane and disciplined to be an arch-villain ... yet.

Being returned to a parallel world and assuming the identity of a namesake she is just attempting to live a prosperous and comfortable life. Leveraging the wealth of her new identity into an ambitious financial project.

With a world full of laughably inept Heroes the only question is when she will discover her inner 'Lex Luthor' ?

drizz
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not a bad idea, but weak execution

Shows potential for the future but needs heavy revisions.

The plot and setting seem solid enough for now, but both style and grammar are quite lacking. Typos, wrong tenses, jumbled sentences, way too many adjectives, etc. - you get my point.

The character had so much potential, but I can't help but feel like it's wasted. After 10 years in another (fantasy) world while, cursed you don't just flawlessly integrate into society. You don't just openly accept the (now new) world as it is. Again, there was a lot of potential for interesting character building there, but it just isn't utilised. 

 

syderitic
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ONE OF MOST ENGAGING AND REWARDING READING EXPERIENCES

One of the most engaging and rewarding reading experiences in this site.
This is my own opinion, hopefully it will be yours after you read a few chapters.
Recomended for those willing to enjoy the journey, rather than achieve a set point in the story.

PS: Also.... easter eggs!!!! :p

The Author has a lot of talent and it shows.

On the style side I have to say that the Author manages to sucessfully blend from narrator to observer and actor in an almost seemless way. It is very engaging and quite refresing. Keeps things sharp and manages to keep the pace of the story more character driven than plot driven.

On the plot side, so far(chapter 18) it keeps building. Let it be plot wise or world wise, it keeps expanding. Waiting to see how it all plays out. Characters are introduced, motivations known, etc. I think it might be a bit early to be too judgemental in this area. I feel that some reviews were hoping for some early closures (but this isn't xianxia). Instead we are being slowly dipped into "This Wrong World". Which has quite a few things right. ;)

No grammar mistakes worth mentioning, but the character section is worth a few pennies. I feel that this is both one of the strongest points and weaker points. On one hand the characters are still being introduced, which in some cases one could say that is going a bit slow, on the other hand I feel that the Author intends to "unwrap" the characters plot wise. As most things are still being set up, there is a lot about the characters that we don't know but that is what is moving this story forward.
On the MC side we understand some of the motivations, some of the times, and what we don't is placed "on hold - let it play out - it will be explained". The abilities are not wholly known but are not relevant to the plot insofar as the ones needed to be known are known and used as plot devices properly. Rather than define the abilities and limitations beforehand and then evolve the character, we get a character with a very comprehensive list of abilities, most well developed, althought somewhat limited - whether imposed by the character's perceptions of the world or by the body of the character. I would say that it leaves room for "recovering" abilities aka "improving character", while also keeping the plot driven mainly by character development. Some might not like this...I find it refreshing. The execution is working so far.

If you're still reading this I urge you to read it yourself. If you took this long reading my own opinion, make your own.
I could not finish without saying something for the rate of chapters. They come and come and come, which is very nice. I worry if the Author can keep it up...please don't burn yourself up. I'm liking your story, please keep writting.

Skada88
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Good read, loads of potential

A good, interesting read that leaves you wanting more.

The necessary characters have good detail. It can sometimes get confusing who is being referred to and there is a few he/she mistakes but otherwise no issues with following the story.

Not too blatant use of 'easter eggs (Which I enjoy), well thought out structure and concepts.

The MC's character seems a little bland at the moment, especially with the hints of her past seemingly at a contrast to her current state of mind, but I am sure that is because it's still early days.

Thanks, author! I can't wait until your next release :)

vitrios
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 honestly i only read the first 2 chapter but couldn't read further. the use of pronouns is terrible. why does the author keep saying the full thing over and over again. "the demon overlord wrath" over and over. Say it one time and make it simpler the next. the overlord or wrath or even he. don't like giving bad review but this story could be much better if it was written with a better flow.