DIVE

by damatu

Original Action Adventure Fantasy Virtual Reality
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Sexual Content

Contains Mature Content. What happens when an extremely intelligent, often manipulative, person gets to be one of the first five people in the world to play the first VRMMO? Join Brenton, AKA Voice0fReason, as he adventures in the realm of DIVE. He might not be the best fighter, or even the best player, but with his cunning he will one day rule this game. That is, if he manages to actually overcome everything the game seems to throw at him.© Starting at chapter 73 the MC will get progressively more powerful. His hardships of the first part of the story have sculpted in him a more potent power base. It will take on a feeling of being a slightly different story, as it will not only focus on his intelligence, but also on his acquisition of power.

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Character Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Total Views :
  • 1,223,827
  • Average Views :
  • 10,927
  • Followers :
  • 1,197
  • Favorites :
  • 401
  • Ratings :
  • 88
  • Pages :
  • 2,202
Advertisement
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Report
Advertisement
Author
damatu

damatu

Achievements
Advertisement
Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Dive 1:Pre-Dive ago
Dive 2:His First Dive ago
Dive 3: His First Quest ago
Dive 4: His First Job ago
Dive 5: His First Cure ago
Dive: Skills ago
Dive 6: His FIrst Charity ago
Dive 7: His First Teaching ago
Dive 8: His First Day Out ago
Critiques ago
Dive 9: His First Battle? ago
Dive 10: His First Battle ago
Dive 11: His First OP ago
Dive 12: An Unexpected Quest ago
Name change ago
Dive 13: His First Training ago
Spell and Ability List ago
Dive 14: His First Vicious Beating ago
Dive 15: His First Promise ago
Dive 16: It's Time to Train ago
Dive 17: His First Dodge ago
Dive 18: More Potions? ago
Dive 19: Staff Skills ago
Dive 20: His First Rage ago
Dive 21: Magic Time? ago
Dive 22: Angry About Skills? ago
Dive 23: The Battle Draws Near ago
Dive 24: The Next Realm ago
Dive 25: The Battle ago
Dive 26: The New Game ago
Dive 27: The Final Days of Growing Up ago
Dive 28: Battle in the Sky ago
Dive 29: Welcome Back to Rand ago
Dive 30: Torture and Summoing ago
Dive 31: Departing Rand ago
Dive 32: Pk and a New City ago
Dive 33: Sewer Escape ago
Dive 34: How to Beat a Slaver ago
Dive 35: Cross After Slavers ago
Dive 36: FIxing a Town Part 1 ago
Dive 37: Summoning and Smithing ago
Dive 38: A Week of Learning and Helping ago
Dive 39: Journey to the Mountains ago
Dive 40: The Fights in Forest and Dungeon ago
Dive 41: Campfire and Worm Roasting ago
Dive 42: To the Mountain, and Through the Mountain ago
Dive 43: The Last of the Wormmen ago
Dive 44: Not the Boss I was Looking For ago
Dive 45: Entering the City ago
Dive 46: Ysga's Hall ago
Dive 47: Escape and Capture ago
Dive 48: Threats and Upgrades ago
Dive 49: Seeds of Evolution ago
Dive 50: A New Experiment ago
Dive 51: The Day Before the Tests ago
Dive 52: The Elder Gods' Secret ago
Dive 53: The Game Begins ago
Dive 54: The Hermit In The Woods ago
Dive 55: Skills and Dungeon Mastering ago
Dive 56: A House and a Beatdown ago
Dive 57: A Plan to Kill the Rest ago
Dive 58: A New Home ago
Dive 59: A new Tactic ago
Dive 60: Meditation and Task Mastery ago
Dive 61: A Cure and An Entrance ago
Dive 62: How to Use a Dungeon ago
Dive 63: Dungeon Diving ago
Dive 64: A Battle and a Decision ago
Dive 65: Infiltration ago
Dive 66: A Battle of Attrition Begins ago
Dive 67: To The Boss Room ago
Dive 68: The Boss Room Battle ago
Dive 69: The Final Dungeon Battle ago
Dive 70: On The Way To M'Path ago
Dive 71: A Reunion ago
Dive 72: End of the First Era ago
Dive 73: The Start of The City ago
Dive 74 : Preparing for the Future ago
Dive 75: Upgrading Fairies ago
Dive 76: Summoning and Dungeon Upgrades ago
Dive 77: Purity and Future Plans ago
Dive 78: The Fights Begin ago
Dive 79: Semi Finals ago
Dive 80: A Rival is Born ago
Dive 81: A New Plan for the Future. ago
Dive 82: The Finals ago
Dive 83: Final Conclusions ago
Dive 84: The Future of the City ago
Happy Anniversary! (Not a Chapter) ago
Dive 85: First Night of the War of Death ago
Dive 86: War on Death ago
Dive 87: Preparing for the Bandit Attack ago
Dive 88: First Bandit Attack ago
Dive 89: Second Bandit Attack ago
Dive 90: A Town's Trust ago
Dive 91: Brainwashing ago
Dive 92: Mind Control ago
Update ago
Dive 93: A New Saga ago
Dive 94: A Merchant ago
Dive 95: Side Story 1 ago
Dive 96: Seeing The Future ago
Dive 97: Side Story 2 ago
Dive 98: Spell Sculpting ago
Dive 99: Information and Experience ago
Dive 100: Voice's Discoveries ago
Dive 101: Coming Home ago
Dive 102: Godhood? ago
Dive 103: A New World ago
Dive 104: The End ago
Dive 105: Epilogue ago
Dive 106: Epilogue-Prologue ago
Reviews

Leave a review

MushGod174
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

includes semi spoilers!!

 

im kind of conflicted about this story, each part of the story gave me a different impression. 

1)  a common start  with your everyday lucky m.c somehow winning a v.r pod.

in the v.r he stated that his goal  "i want to become an heavy armor wearing healer" and  kept me interested to how he will achive it  ( 4 stars).


2) After stating his goal, he ignored it and focused on unrelated things as Alchemy. (3 stars)

3) He started his training towards his original goal. (4.5 stars).

4)The story got to it's climax while keeping me tight on my seat. (5 stars). 

5)Major twist that mostly ignores the whole story of the "First Arc" and changes the main's char mind set completley. after this part i stopped reading, for me this twist ruined the story (2.5 stars).


To sum it all up it was a good interesting read with a twist that changes this entire fiction. 
(in my opinion that twist ruined the story but thats only my opinion). 


p.s -> this is my first review and this is how i saw this fiction. 


jburge1
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Story suffers from a terrible MC

I'm out on this story.  I tried to hold on as long as I could, because I really to love the game structure, but the MC is just too much of a douche for me to continue.  When you start rooting for the MC to die, it is time to move on.

StenDuring
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

DIVE floats on story and submerges on character

This review is part of a review swap.

 

First i need to say that I thoroughly enjoyed reading DIVE.

 

Second that I give five stars to something I find excellent, including the 'sub-stars'.

 

Third that the author explicitly have asked for a review that will serve as a tool for creating an even better story. Thus what I write here will be harsher than the stars I have given. Observe that the stars mirror my experience of reading the story.

 

Now on to the review, valid up to and including chapter 97.

 

DIVE is ongoing, and it's still very long. My guess is anywhere between 150 K and 200 K words. It took me four reading sessions to finish what is published, and trust me, I wouldn't binge anything this size on a computer screen unless I liked what I read.

 

DIVE is a standard VRMMORPG, fantasy setting, story with an OP male MC. Not the trapped inside a game, but the MC can log in and log out at will. There's even a miniscule outside-the-game story. It's important for the story, but it also runs at a substantially lower quality than the 'real' story. The little 'outside' -story would be given an OK three stars and no more.

 

DIVE is told in third person limited, and first person, and third person limited. This because DIVE relies on reader input, including polls, acting on comments and a few reader contests managed by the author.

 

We follow VoiceOfReason, or Brenton in real life, who wins access to the greatest invention since sliced bread, and starts playing the first auto-adaptible VR-game in the world. I'm guessing the real-life setting is in the relatively near future, anything from ten to forty years in the future.

 

Brenton is your ordinary special snowflake; give the boy a rather hard time growing up and he has a perfect excuse to void just about every moral and ethical normative value-system that makes a person acceptable in society. In short he's a whining arsehole. You punch him in his face, he stabs you from behind, burns down your house, kills your cat and commits grand larcency to have your mother go permanently bancrupt -- and it's only fair because his father left his family.

 

In short, there's a good reason we put these people in jail and throw away the key.

 

DIVE revolves around getting new skills and abilities, with painstaking care taken to show exactly how these attributes evolve and contribute to each other. The game DIVE is a far cry from World of Warcraft, or at least as long as the MC is concerned. Gaining levels are central to just everyone else, but the MC is explicitly both horribly underlevelled and OP, because the game is rigged to make him OP.

 

Notably Brenton whines and squeals every time a desperately needed bugfix is installed that prevents him from going totally haywire due to broken game mechanics. BECAUSE THEY'RE AFTER ME, etc, etc.

 

We're presented with a strawman reason why a global corporate dragon allows Brenton to run rampant in the game. Notably his dear mother and tolerated aunt can do whatever they want with the multi-billion creation without corporate management coming down with the hammer of God on their heads.

 

The story is divided into a few arcs. First comes  huge arc where Voice (Brenton's short name in the game) learns the game and how to play around with his skills and abilities. After that two shorter arcs where he first explores the world and later builds himself a powerbase.

 

There are numerous secondary characters, both players as well as NPC-characters, but as Voice would have said: who gives a shit -- they're just discardable tools for enhancing Voice's pesonal glory and power. Well, at least until you try to rape anyone. Rape is bad. Voice goes ballistic whenever rape is an issue. He'll nuke a region if there's an attempted rape. Killing, maiming, torturing, sacrificing, deceiving, genocide  and mentally raping people is fine though; probably because those are happy pastimes for Voice himself.

 

So for the distribution of the stars.

 

Despite everything I've written thus far. The overall experience is a near perfect 4.5 stars. Voice is a disgusting pig, but he's a well-written disgusting pig who goes on doing his disgusting stuff in a very enjoyable manner.

 

Style is a more than OK 3.5 stars. We're talking a perfectly acceptable vocabulary, an easy to read English, and a good disposition of the content.

 

Undisciplined handling of POV drags the experience down. While the story follows one character at a time, all too often we're given the thoughts of a different character, sometimes in the same paragraph, which suddenly starts a ping-pong match of head hopping of the worst degree.

 

I'm personally not too fond of author-reader interaction barely discernable from the story, but in web-fiction this is something that creates a connection between author and reader. Just chalk it down to this revieweing old coot if your don't agree.

 

As a result of the reader-interaction the story swaps from third person to first person halfway into the story -- and later back again. This is a big no-no for me. Stick to one style of POV.

 

It becomes extra confusing when the story runs in FP and the need to feed readers with information results in small chunks of third person narations. First person is an important choice to make. It means the reader gets to know what the narrator knows, and no more. If the reader has to know more, then third person is the way to go.

 

Story is a near perfect 4.5 stars. It's just that enjoyable a read.

 

Grammar is a solid four stars. I'm not giving my normal 0.5 extra star as I usually do on RRL. It's a matter of seconds to run text through a spell and grammar -checker in any word-processor on the market, including the free ones. The errors are outright stupid -- and totally unnessescary. I'm probably applying a few of them myself right now writing this review, because I type it directly into the RRL web-interface. There's no excuse doing it when uploading a story here.

 

Character, oh well, character is an almost OK 2.5 stars -- and it gained a bonus 0.5 stars because most of the side-characters are presented at a solid 4 star level. Voice, however, is an atrocity. He IS a character, or else the one star hammer would come flying, but anything above a poor two star ranking is a no-go.

 

Anything that responds by going on a crusade becasue someone forgot to give him his Christmas candy is a thoroughly bad character, and I'm not talking about the evil kind of bad here. Voice is supposed to be an adult, but he behaves like a three year old throwing a tantrum. Admittedly a genius three year old. Voice never fails to impersonate any four letter acronym given to a kid who wasn't told to shut the hell up and get a grip of himself. In DIVE he takes revenge on everyone who never bothered him in real life, because in DIVE Voice can prey on the weak. He never stops doing that, and every time he does it's accompanied by a less than weak excuse it's acceptable because he's such a special snowflake.

 

All in all I give the overall experience a 4.5 stars because for me, personally, plot is king. If I had lived for reading fantastic characters rather than fantastic plot, then I would have hammered the overall experience down to an almost OK 2.5 stars. But I don't, because for me plot is indeed king.

koutacchi
  • Overall Score

Cool touch for the main character

Well for once, you don't usually see this kind of character as main.
Here's what I can say about him after reading up to the latest chapter.

He's kinda like weed except he's not here for the money, he got lucky and got to be one of the first pioneers of the game. He only sees others as obstacles or stepping stones to become one of the best player(if that's the goal of this story) of the game. Only time he cared much was when he was reminded of his past life which is pretty much self-gratifying.

I think I got it right, as for the main plot not seeing it yet as of now the story is pretty weak but it's still starting so I'm just gonna wait and see if it gets any better.

Veerat
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Not bad so far - but nothing distinguishing

The Story is okay but the tags are wrong, it´s neither sci-fi or original. The only applicalbe tags should be VR and Adventure , Fantasy. We´ll see about the mature.

Some missing words, but all in all readable.

Reader The Quick
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Style and Grammar are really good and need no changes normally.

I don’t know where the story is going so i won’t rate it very well.

I understand that Voice is very low leveled but it’s honestly annoying reading about the protagonist being pushed around so much like a fucking mop.

Even though he’s low leveled he trained rather diligently from what was read and is very sufficient(It takes a while, along while but he eventually gets the hang of it) in battle(at least with monsters) but in chapter 25 he battled like a piece of shit punk who only got pounded on after running away. In every way it is frustrating and annoying, and if you think about it in almost every fight so far he always gets the shit beat out of him(even if he managed to beat the enemy eventually. 

A lot.

He’s very weak, fussy, and he can’t seem to kill an opponent by himself. 

And to be completely honest after 25 chapters and he’s still so disgustingly weak it’s well: gross.

I’ll give a proper review how i see fit on this.  

Though i won’t change the character review.

Gentleman
  • Overall Score

Has several good notes, but it could use some hitches

All-in-all, I like the story though the main character does not struggle as much as he could otherwise.  It makes the story seems very nonchalant.

drakninja
  • Overall Score

Not bad if you add in some more then it can get very interestings.

LIke the fact that it a little dark. It was very slow to start but seem to pick up as it goes.

 

Now if you can add in some more pet or involve them more with the story it would be nice.

add in more drama and excitement would be nice. so far he is not doing much.

NaoSou
  • Overall Score

Very enjoyable and addicting

To begin with, a shout out to the story with the most believable child/infant arc that I have seen on this website.

 

About the FF by itself. If you are the kind of person who likes:

- An MC that is super strong and cool and all other characters are his permanent sycophants.

- An MC who collects girls as if they were pokemon cards and all of the girls are completely okay with his harem

- A story that is needlessly cruel with/or a over the top dark/brutal MC so it can pretend to be mature, becauuse children apparently think that gore/dark/violent = mature  (You know who I am talking about)

- A clear and distinct definition, in black and white, of good and evil.

 

This FF is most likely not for you. 

In here, you have a MC that uses of plans and deceit to defeat stronger opponents. Of flaterry and trickery to get in the good graces of other people. At the same time, he does have his own sternghts, they simply are not overwhelming. He is strong, relatively speaking to the people of his own level. He gets strong, but at a slower pace. The story isn't about how strong he is or how many fights he win. He has minions for that.

 

While I said the MC gets stronger slowly, the pacing is good. The story doesn't go too fast or too slow. Things that aren't relevant to the story don't appear, everything that is done or happens is with reason. Nothing is skipped also. Questions aren't left unanswered. Basically, no fillers and straight to the point without being roundabout.

 

To summarize it: A story that takes place in a common VR fantasy world, with monsters, magics and intrusive gods. It follows a MC that walks a blurry line of good and evil, doing what he sees fit to achieve his objectives in a pleasantly paced way.

flifox
  • Overall Score

Another mc psycopath good story all about lying