A Gentleman's Curse

by Vistiel

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Romance Anti-Hero Lead Magic Male Lead Non-Human lead Reincarnation Secret Identity Slice of Life
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity

A life taken before its time

Through endless dark tunnels and down many holes

Not due to chance nor done by crime

But the whim of a god who handles our souls

 

Living a lonely life in the States, Vistiel hadn't expected his situation to change for a long time. When his soul is stripped of his body, however, plans change. Thrown into a new world with his old regrets and the memories of a life that is no longer his, he can either embrace this new environment and make a new one here, or suffocate under his past. 

 

Hey! Author here. Chapters post every other day and so far are anywhere from 3.5-6.5k words a piece. This'll be the first story I've ever written but I have a plot in mind and a plan in place. Just let me know if there's anything you'd like to see or if something about the grammar is bugging you. Thank you for reading!

Please keep in mind there will be some minor adjustments made to the earlier chapters as the book progresses. I'm building a story chapter by chapter, so I may/will need to go back and touch up some things.

If you like the story, please consider supporting me on Patreon!

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Vistiel

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Xen3n
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I definitely recommend this.

"A gentleman's curse" - a typical RRL story tinged with nostalgia.

While the premise of the story is nothing to write home about, a fairly generic reincarnated into another world with a cheat that's not really a cheat, it invoked in me a sense of nostalgia. The beginning really reminds me of Mushoku Tensei. It invoked in me the same kind of feeling as Mushoku Tensei did when i still did not know what a japanese light novel was. 

There are only 11 chapters released, the latest being "Pain is weakness leaving the body" so i can't really say anything substantial about the plot. It seems like there are a few things in play already, but in my eyes they seem a bit forced. What i mean by forced is they are too generic and are set up artificially for the main character to overcome. It's not bad by any means, but it's nothing anything special either.

The grammar is spectacular by RRL standards. 

Now, what really makes this story shine in my eyes, the characters. All of the characters, except the father, that have been introduced by this point feel alive. The female characters and main character are written very well. The father feels lacking in comparison. I noticed that you tried to let the main character and the father experience a "moment" and try to get them closer, but it felt lacking. Like, something you want to quickly get over it to get to something else which you find more interesting. The father isn't "dead" by any means, but compared to let's say the three female characters he's somewhat lacking.

Overall, in my humble opinion, i think that the story is well written. Even more so, since this is your first attempt at writing. It has potential.

PS: i'm giving you all 5 stars, cause fuck that garbage person who gave you 0.5 stars. The real rating is: style 4 stars, story 4 stars, grammar 5 stars, character 4.5 stars. Do please keep in mind that i'm a harsh judge, but for your first story you really did impress me.

Keep up the good work and good luck!

dark asura
  • Overall Score

Good stuff highly recommended

  1. Likable characters
  2. Good grammar 
  3. Nice writing style
  4. Keep it up author
  5. Wish there was more chapters
  6. Looking forward to where this is going
FuriousFrog
  • Overall Score

Since there is no review here I thought I'd be the first. This while no means an origional plot. Adult reincarnated into baby figures out how to use mana etc etc. Is still a great story. Only 10 chapters in but it's got good pacing, the style is fun and easy to read and most importantly of all there seems to be some direction and overarching plot. Also as I said before we're only 10 chapters in and I for one am excited to see where we end up. 

Ohh and the grammar is good.

Lordofthepies
  • Overall Score

Honestly, I think I have too high standards for grammar sometimes.  But, apart from mixing up tenses a couple times, the grammar is very good.  Also I think in reincarnation stories the psychological impact of losing your entire family/world is never really stated.  In this one it's done pretty well.

DrSupbro
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This Will Be Another Royalroad Great

I have read many stories on here through the years, and from the many many stories I have read, only a few have been given 5 stars by me. These include such stories as Don't Fear the Reaper, Re: Write, Change: New World, The Legend of Randidly Ghosthound, Everybody Loves Large Chests, Godslayer, and a few more. This story has the potential to get one as well. 

This story is only getting better. The character development is there. There is plot, and behind the scenes detail. The characters are fleshed out, and the world itself isn't ignored. There are many secrets yet to be discovered by the readers, and this is a story that contains an MC that will be overpowered soon, but it isn't as if everything is thrown to him. 

I LOVE stories with main characters that are overpowered. I wish there was more to read out there. One of the bad things people do with these types of stories is just give them too much power way too soon in the story, making the rest all bland and meaningless. Just filler for the reader to waste their time on. This story eggs you on as you read everyone wondering just how powerful a human learning magic at the age of 2 will be when the previous record was 8. This is without them even knowing that knowledge is power, and he has a lot of it as I'll explain in a bit.

This story will not be a waste of your time whatsoever. The absolute only reason this story has a 4.5/5 right now for me is purely because I want to see it fleshed out a bit more. I don't want to rate it 5 stars only for the author to go somewhere bad with the story. I value my 5 star ratings extremely, and this story is definitely going to be worthy of it once some more time passes. 

The idea that knowledge is power that comes up again and again makes the story unique. It isn't some inborn talent. No, it is the knowledge the MC had as an electrician. He is going to eventually be the only one to commune with lightning by getting struck by lightning because he KNOWS things. He knows that filling himself up with negative charge like every other lightning mage out there does will only result in death, and he has a leg up on others. His rise to power is nearing, and we haven't even gotten to the school arc yet! 

Please just read the story. You won't regret it. It is far too amazing and detailed to pass up. There are only so very few like it on this site. 

-I am also dying to know if the MC is going to get wings like the story picture shows, or if that is a Celestial from the story. Having it be the MC somehow would probably be amazing. 

Kydsdad
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Very well written and engaging story.  Defin one i will continue to follow (in spite of the fae, whom i cant stand).  Characters are well thought out and grammar is excellent.  Keep up the excellent work.

Spartanstoryteller
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This is a great story that accomplishes is what other stories tried to live up to when a main character is transported to a world of magic and combat

IneptBird
  • Overall Score

A Story that can make you cry

I just finish the available chapters and I was simply blew away. It almost made me cry for both his pain and his families because we all have those types of feeling inside and it lets us connect on a deeper level to the character. My hope for this story is that it won't end on a cliff and it will go on to more and more it is simply just too good.

stev007
  • Overall Score

Good stuff. If you stop before its done ill haunt you after death until it is.

DrWinter
  • Overall Score

Now "A gentleman's curse" is like a lot of other stories on RRL, a typical RRL story with reincarnation.

Yet the grammar is really good for RRL, there is no wondering what the author is trying to say.

The characters are all alive, yes the father is beginning to lack behind, but the author may change that in the future.

Now what really makes this story shine is the reality. The story shows what really happens if you cross over, with one's memories.