> Kira PoV <

“You said he wouldn’t mind.” (Kira)

I’m pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration. I really should have asked some more questions before agreeing to this.

“Technically, I said he’d enjoy the company.” (Kelly)

“Technically, that’s still not what happened, is it?” (Kira)

I heard she barged into her cousin’s meeting with some client. If I knew in advance he was a big-time merchant I’d have went with her. Understandably, he was outraged.

“Three teeth. You knocked out three of his teeth!” (Kira)

When he understandably got loud, she replied by punching him in the face.

“Don’t worry about it, it’s a dwarf thing.” (Kelly)

Surely not even dwarves are meat-headed enough to overlook this sort of thing! Especially not someone with enough sense to make it as a merchant in the capital!

“Couldn’t be helped. He was giving me the signal you know?” (Kelly)

“And what sort of signal would that be?” (Kira)

“The ‘please-hit-me-now-I-can’t-stand-these-guys’ signal. With his fingers.” (Kelly)

I’m not even going to reply to that.

“Is that why you threatened those people into running away?” (Kira)

“Well yeah, they drove my cousin into a corner, there’s no way they don’t deserve it.” (Kelly)

We saw several people flee in terror when we arrived here. One of them apparently even soiled themselves. Just what sort of terror did she show them? No, right now I shouldn’t be angry about some stranger’s pants.

“Forget them, what about the girls?! How could you leave them outside on their own like that!” (Kira)

“Wouldn’t want them to see me get violent.” (Kelly)

“Then don’t get violent in the first place!” (Kira)

“It’s fine, Nano said he’d look after them.” (Kelly)

So that’s why! I was wondering why Nano’s butler golem was active. It’s waiting outside with Ellie and the kids. I wouldn’t want them to see this shameful scene.

“Nano! Don’t enable her!” (Kira)

{I assumed she wanted to meet with him in private. I didn’t expect her to literally break and enter.}

Well yeah, I guess Nano has a point. Not even I could have stopped her in time. Looking at the dwarf-shaped hole in the front door, she probably didn’t even knock. This is a crime no matter how you look at it, I wonder why the guard isn’t here yet?

“I hope you realise whose salary is paying for any damages or bail.” (Kira)

“It’ll be fine, my cousin will straighten this out soon as he wakes up.” (Kelly)

“I just hope he actually wakes up….” (Kira)

He took a direct hit from Scrappy. Being unconscious is bad but it’s a miracle he’s even alive!

Well nothing for it, I guess we’ll stick around until someone wakes up or arrests us…

“By the way, Ellie, stop tossing our daughters around.” (Kira)

{“Woah! Kira found us out again!”} (Ellie)

{Impressive as always.}

No, those three already revealed your plans to me a little while ago you know? 

I wish I had at least one more responsible adult around here… I can’t even rely on Nano lately, that go-with-the-flow attitude has too many problems in and of itself.

* * *

“Mrs Quasse, I’m here to bring you to your interview.” (Lilly)

Lilly showed up just before noon as promised.

“I’m surprised you found us, I was worried since we didn’t say where we’d be staying.” (Kira)

“Why do you think no guards interrupted the family reunion.” (Lilly)

She flashes a wry smile. I see, she was keeping an eye on us.

“Still, to just smile and accept all that, this merchant is amazing in his own right…” (Lilly)

“Please don’t remind me. I can never understand those meat-headed types.” (Kira)

Just as Kelly said, he woke up, laughed off the busted teeth and let us stay in his manor. Please spare me from any more dwarves for the rest of the trip, I don’t think I can take it.

“Ellie should be out shortly, she’s just- ELLIE STOP TOSSING THE KIDS AROUND! HOW MANY TIMES?” (Kira)

Every single time my back is turned! I don’t even need to guess anymore, I just scold them every once in awhile and they always show me guilty expressions after. Maybe I should just give it up, it feels like a waste of energy.

…

It was pretty fun that one time though.

* * *

Lilly leads us to the Ministry of Information building. It looks like any other 3-story townhouse. Maybe it’s on purpose? Well it doesn’t matter.

Ellie and I are guided to a place that looks like an office. There’s a few desks arranged around an upside-down ‘U’ shape and two chairs are placed in the middle of the room. Although it looks like this place could seat 10 or maybe more people, it’s mostly empty. There are two people sitting on the opposite side of the room.

Lilly gestures for us to sit in the two chairs and then she takes her seat next to them. Looks like she’s one of these interviewers.

“Good day Mrs and Mrs Quasse. I’m the Director of the Ministry of Information, Foren Grimm.” (Director)

“Good day, Director Grimm.” (Kira)

First to speak is the man in the middle. Although he’s the youngest here, he looks the worst. His cheeks are a bit hollow and his eyes looks like he hasn’t slept in weeks. He’s almost like a walking corpse. His black hair is already thinning, creating a rather ghastly, undertaker-like atmosphere.

“This is the Grandmaster of the Adventurer’s Guild, Peter Kilroy.” (Director)

The director presents the mountain of muscles that’s shaped like a man. I can’t tell what his height is, but even sitting down he’s taller than me! His beard and hair are thick and blonde and his face looks a little too small for his head. This is my first time meeting the Grandmaster, but he looks like three meat-heads strapped together. Not something I wanted to see.

“Good day, Grandmaster Kilroy.” (Kira)

“Hrmpf.” (Grandmaster)

He grunted at me. I’m not sure what I was expecting, honestly.

“And I believe you’re also somehow acquainted with my employee, Inspector Lilly Alasandara.” (Director)

We exchange nods with Lilly.

“Now, let’s get to it. What is the official reason you requested a Flight Badge through Baron Luron?” (Director)

Right into it huh? Well, I don’t dislike this sort of thing.

“A flying monster such as a Wyvern or Gryphon is necessary to cut down travel time between commissions. As adventurers, we spend too much time traveling, so a fast and safe mode of transport would be a great asset to us.” (Kira)

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

“I see. And can you tell us the unofficial reason for desiring a Flight Badge?” (Director)

… that’s a thing?

“Um… same as the official one?” (Kira)

“Let me rephrase that question. Do you really intend to use such an expensive and dangerous thing such a flying mount for something so… mundane? You won’t be carrying goods, transporting clients or scouting with it?” (Director)

“The only goods we will be carrying are arms, armor and supplies for personal use. Escort clients usually have their own transportation and our team already has an excellent scout.” (Kira)

I gently pat Ellie to emphasize my point.

“So, your objective really is to just cut down on travel time for your commissions?” (Director)

“I am under the impression the Director thinks such a thing is a waste of a Badge, is this so?” (Kira)

“Well, yes, frankly. It’s hard to think you’d gain much profit just from that.” (Director)

“There are things more important than profit.” (Kira)

“Forgive me, but this is hard to believe when heard from someone who is, and I quote the report from Inspector Alasandara, a high-level scrooge and all around money-grubber.” (Director)

What? I look accusingly at Lilly, but she casually averts her eyes. Surely I’m frugal, but it’s by no means that bad! Is this revenge for making her pay for riding inside our carriage for three days? I thought she was more professional than that!

“*Cough* Director, may I bring three key points to this committee’s attention?” (Kira)

“Go ahead.” (Director)

“Thank you. First of all, Adventurers don’t get a pension when they retire. We have to hoard and stockpile our finances to last us through those twilight years.

Second of all, while it’s true that feeding and taking care of a flying mount is expensive, our home has plenty of access to food and living space. Therefore, something like raising a gryphon is not as big a financial burden on us as one might expect.

Lastly, approximately a third of our time is spent on the road. We would much rather spend this time raising our children.” (Kira)

“Children? Inspector Alasandara, I do not believe there was a mention of children in your report.” (Director)

“Excuse me, Director Grimm, you neglected to read the second page of the report. Again.” (Lilly)

The Director flips over one of the pieces of paper and his already pale face somehow went a bit whiter. Is the Ministry of Information really okay with this guy in charge?

“Ah, forgive me for this blunder. Then, would the Investigator kindly summarize her findings on this topic?” (Director)

Lilly then briefly touches on how we found the two girls during our travels, how we brought them back to our home, how the adoption process went and how they appear to be in good hands. All of this is information she got directly from us though.

“Okay, I understand. I believe I have a firm grasp on [Black Flame]’s motives. As a father myself, I can understand the need to watch over one’s children. Inspector Alasandara has also given a favorable opinion in her report. 

From the Ministry of Information, we have found no reason to deny Kiressara mil Quasse’s request. However, since this is a matter of the Adventurer’s Guild, Grandmaster Kiljoy has the final word.” (Director)

Well… that’s something, right. However, knowing this meat-head he’ll probably say ‘I won’t allow it unless you defeat me in single combat’ or something along those lines.

…

Huh? Surely this is where that guy should speak up, right?

“Excuse me mister Director. I believe the Grandmaster is sleeping.” (Ellie)

“...” (Kira, Lilly, Director)

We stare at the statue-like Grandmaster.

*Sssuuuu. Sssuuu. Ssssuuuu.*

Now that the room is dead silent, I can hear faint snoring. This guy really did fall asleep. Sitting upright with crossed arms and eyes wide open.

“Well. This is exceedingly bad.” (Director)

“What’s wrong Director? You look especially troubled?” (Kira)

I mean yes, it’s embarrassing but he looks more like he’s worried rather than ashamed.

“Kilroy here isn’t human. He’s a Mountain Giant. His people sleep like rocks. Literally. It’s almost impossible to wake them up and I have no idea how long they will sleep for. Could be minutes, could be days.” (Director)

Really? Is the guild going to be okay with this sort of person at the head?

“May I try something, mister Director?” (Ellie)

“Ah, sure. I suppose adventurers should resolve this amongst themselves.” (Director)

“Okay! I’ll be back in a bit!” (Ellie)

She instantly bolted out of the door with glee in her eyes. This is bad. She won’t hurt him right? Wait, can she hurt him? I hear Mountain Giants have skin like stone and shoddy swords simply shatter against it.

Ellie comes back shortly after with a huge cast iron pot. The kind you make to feed a whole barracks of soldiers.

“Um, the rest of you might want to stand back a little.” (Ellie)

The Director and Lilly get up from the table and come over to where I am. I have a bad premonition about this, so let’s get some insurance.

“--- [Barrier]” (Kira)

Ellie places the pot over the Grandmaster’s head, covering it completely. She takes out her sword and strikes the pot with the back of the blade.

*DONNNNNNNNNNNnnnnn*

A bell-like sound reverberates through the room. The pot is slightly dented…

*DONNNNNNNNNNNnnnnn*

*DONNNNNNNNNNNnnnnn*

*DONNNNNNNNNNNnnnnn*

She repeats it a few more times. The pot is looking like it might break by now.

The Grandmaster finally moves, slowly reaching up to his head. Ellie swiftly removes the pot and retreats inside my [Barrier].

“Huuuummm. That. Was. A. Good. Nap.” (Grandmaster)

He yawns widely, then speaks slowly while scratching his head.

“Grimm. Is. The. Mage. Girl. Here. Yet?” (Grandmaster)

This guy has been sleeping the entire time!? I thought he responded to me earlier but he probably grunted in his sleep reflexively.

Hey, the guild isn’t going to suddenly collapse, right?