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A note from AaronDragon

Yep, so here's the chapter, and yeah it kinda gets kinda deep into some meta-pschology there in the middle...

Anyway i'm sure you all will have no problem figuring things out, and if not then i'm sure someone will explain it in the comments anyway... Oh, and we'll get into the Actual dungeon building stuff in a few chapters, so dont worry about why the story with dungeon in it's name doesnt have any dungeony parts to it's name yet.

I'll edit this later on... Probably...

ENJOY!!!

 

My world had devolved into fear, confusion, and pain that was only broken by surges of near uncontrollable rage and hatred that brought me ever closer to my next inevitable episode. I couldn’t reach anyone’s mind even though I knew that I was handled by at least four different people, I couldn’t reach Nalia’s mind to have her come rescue me and kill my torturers, and I couldn’t even feel my goblin minion’s mind. I was alone and everything hurt, I could actually feel were I’d been filed down and cut.

“Hurts… It hurts Alon… Hurts so much…” For once the curse and I were on the same page, the pain was almost unbearable. I was actually looking forward to my next episode now and was doing nothing to suppress the hatred and rage that heralded it, at least while the curse was in control I had a temporary reprieve from pain. “Make the hurting stop… Make it stop… No more… Hurts…”

I can still vaguely remember when hearing the curse suffering in my sister’s voice had bothered me, that was before I started to bleed mana so heavily I had to start constantly offering up memories to cope with the loss and keep my mana running rampant. I’ve been offering up memories of my pain, of my time since I was separated from my goblin minion. This way at least I only have to suffer in the present and will have no memory of it later on, it was a small comfort.

I could feel when another part of myself was cut away and my mental scream was so deafening it drowned out the curse’s own pained muttering and moans. Thankfully my pain feed into the rage and hatred that was already clouding my mind and heart, as my awareness fell away and I sank into the blissful sleep like state of an episode I could hear the curse screaming.

“No… No! NO! NO!!! It’s your turn! It’s still your turn! Not me! Not me!!! It’s too soon for it to be me again!” I chuckled darkly at the pain and fear in the curse’s voice as my mind sank into oblivion, it was her turn to suffer this torture now…

 

***

 

I… I think I may have sacrificed too much of myself… I didn’t know my name anymore, I couldn’t remember it. I knew about myself of course so obviously I hadn’t sacrificed too many of the memories that made up my identity, I still remembered my sister and that I was human before. I just couldn’t remember my name anymore.

“No more… Alon, no more… Can’t feel… Can’t see… So scared Alon… So scared…” It was the voice that reminded me, it knew my name even if I didn’t.

Shut up, it’s over now… I couldn’t keep the sympathy out of my voice, I knew how badly she had suffered even if I couldn’t remember my own suffering. Besides… Soon it’ll all be over… I could feel how little mana the curse had in its pattern now, there was so little I doubted it would last another hour let alone another day. I wasn’t sure how exactly I felt about that, I had wanted the curse gone and had planned on killing it myself but now that it was on the verge of death it seemed too pathetic to kill.

“No… I don’t… want… that…” The voice of the curse was fading out.

I could feel its fear and pain almost as if it was my own, I offered it the only advice I could give in this situation. Sorry, we don’t always get what we want…

I was Alon, Alon was my name. I had to remember that but I also had to keep my power running rampant as well. We don’t always get what we want…

 

***

 

I was squeezed into something. I could still remember when I first noticed it, my body had been slowly healing until it seemed to just run into an immovable wall. I could slightly feel what it was but the sense of perception that was invoked whenever something came in contact with my body wasn’t as strong as it normally was for whatever reason. I hoped that the problem was simply that my sense was having trouble identifying the material and not that I was slowly losing that last ability to perceive some part of my surroundings. I don’t think my mind could handle being totally blind, deaf, and mute.

I could also feel the curse faintly lingering in the back of my mind, it seemed to be sleeping or maybe dormant. Still it wasn’t dead nor had it disappeared like I thought it would have five memory sacrifices ago. I wonder if Nalia is still out there waiting for me? Probably… I didn’t give her any specific instructions for what to do after I got into the city. I guess that was another stupid mistake of mine…

I have had a lot of time to reflect on the plan that had landed me in this situation and now wondered how I could have ever thought it could work. There were no real details to the plan, it had just been about how to get me into the city and from there hope that someone could help me. I didn’t consider that maybe humans might attack an unattended goblin whether it was a slave or not, I hadn’t considered that without one of my minions I was essentially powerless in a city full of beings with developed and well defended minds, and I certainly hadn’t considered I’d be captured. Really it was a wonder a plan that flawed had even gotten me through the city gates, but then again I had never been much of a planner so the fact that what I came up with was full of flaws wasn’t all that surprising.

I also had no idea how much time had passed, all I knew was that ever since my last torture session occasionally someone would pick me up. It never lasted long and I couldn’t ever do anything to them since I couldn’t ever force my mana past the first block to their minds. I was however fairly sure I knew where I was now, I had the feeling I was in some sort of jewelry or accessory store. It was actually pretty obvious when I considered that my current body was a unique looking stone, of course someone would take the valuable looking stone they found on a goblin and go to sell. It also gave my torture sessions a new meaning and let me see them in a new light. I wasn’t being purposefully tortured by some cruel and sadistic lunatic, instead what I went through was probably the result of a clerk or craftsman shaping what they thought was a gem. This realization is what led me to thinking of the thing that was currently restraining me was probably something my body had been set into, right now it was likely that I felt so many people picking me up on occasion because I was being displayed as a ring or maybe aa necklace.

Well, that was what I thought at least, there was no real way for me to confirm any of my suspicions right now though. Alright, enough. I need to think of some way out of this situation… And therein lies my problem, I didn’t have the first clue as to how I would be able to overcome this situation. I couldn’t even move on my own and the only real hope I had was if I could manage to keep my mana in its rampaging state and managed to make a new minion to take me out of this city and back to Nalia. I had already basically given up any hope of a mage or priest being able to help me, at this point I doubted I’d even be able to convince them that I wasn’t just a hunk of rock since my last attempt of speaking through a minion had ended so poorly.

For a moment a crushing sadness weighed on my mind as I thought about how I’d never see my sister again and how Dawn probably thought I was dead. I couldn’t remember much about them after offering up so many memories, but I knew I had lost people I cared about. Even if I couldn’t remember them something deep inside me screamed that I had lost friends, family, maybe even pets, and now I was losing Dawn too. It hurt in ways I didn’t even think possible, in ways that almost made me miss the physical agony I had experienced during my time in this city.

For a long time I had just mourned, but eventually my sorrow had morphed into fear and now I stagnated in a state of crippling loneliness and dread. For the first time in what felt like forever I was alone in my mind as what little of the curse that was left slept and I spent the time drowning in misery and wishing for company of any sort. What had started out as depression stemming from the fact I would never see my sister again had slowly grown into a full blown breakdown, I couldn’t stand the loneliness and the need for companionship that resonated inside me was slowly driving me to insanity.

I had even started begging the curse to wake up, I was so desperate that I’d rather subject myself to an eternity sharing my mind and battling for control of my body with the curse than go another day without someone to be with. I didn’t fully understand it but ever since I realized I would never be able to be with my sister again this need for companionship began to grow inside me, it was bearable at first but now it had gotten to some point so far beyond unbearable that I couldn’t describe it anymore. I needed someone, anyone to be with. No, it didn’t even need to be a person, I just needed something, anything, to be here with me. I needed something to share myself with, someone I could bind myself to and keep for all of eternity. I needed a companion, and at this point tying myself to a curse that had some level of consciousness would be something I would be more than willing to give up my mind and body for.

I… I’m not complete… I… Why can’t I be complete? Why has nothing come!? WHY!?!? NALIA! NALIA!!! For what felt like the hundredth time I desperately called out for my serpent as I nearly flayed my own mind in an attempt to reach hers. WHY!?!? I… I need someone here… I NEED TO HAVE SOMETHING HERE!!!

I hardly even noticed as my rampant mana began to calm and recede back towards my body, it wasn’t important compared to my all-consuming need for something to be my eternal companion…

 

***

 

Alon… I’m Alon… Alon… Alon all alone… Hehehehehehahahahahaha… Alon all alone, Alon all alone, ALON ALL ALONE!!!

HAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahaha…

 

***

 

Why am I alone? Why? Didn’t there used to be someone? Someone by my side, someone who was my companion… My partner, my friend, my reason for living… Who was it? Where did it go? Why isn’t it here? Does it not want me anymore? It left me…

No I left it… I was taken away… who took me away! Why! WHY!!! I need to be with my partner! Why would it do something like this!?!? Why would it force us apart!?!?

I’ll kill it… it needs to die for this. No, more than that… It needs to suffer for taking me from my partner… I’ll make it suffer… I’ll make sure it suffers forever. I’ll give it pain. Misery. Fear. Hatred. I’ll give it all that constantly…

Who am I again? Oh right, I’m Alon. My partner? Who was my partner? She was so important… She? Female? My partner was a female… Yes! Of course my partner would be female if I am male! It wouldn’t feel right if I had a male partner… I don’t think I like males in that way, so males can’t be my partner…

Light of the morning… The light that shines brightest of all… that’s what my partner’s name means. That is the meaning of Dawn. My partner shines so bright, always so bright…

Dawn… Alon and Dawn… My partner was also my kin? That’s strange… Maybe I had that sort of preference? I don’t think I did though… But then would she still be my partner?

I…

I…

I…

I am Alon… I’m a human being… Right?

 

***

 

Alon is human… Alon is alone… Alon is weak…

I should kill Alon… If I do that then I can be Alon with no regrets…

 

***

 

I am Alon… The new Alon, a better version of Alon. I need to be stronger than the old Alon, smarter than the old Alon, better than the old Alon, GREATER than the old Alon…

I must forge myself anew, and as I am reforged I must not allow myself to become like the old Alon… I am Alon and I shall be like finely tempered metal forged into the most deadly of blades… I shall not let myself repeat the mistakes of the old me, the Alon who allowed himself to become a soft and deformed thing that feared even taking a life…

I am not human… I will never be human again… I am something new now, something better… I refuse to cling to that old humanity now, I’ll embrace what I am. I will rejoice in my new being.

This is a chance… A chance to begin anew, a chance to live a new life unburdened by the stains of the past… I chance I must take…

I need a companion… A partner… Something with which I can keep and share this new life with…

If I need a partner than I will just take one! If something hurts me I will hurt it back! If I am weak then I shall grow stronger.

I am Alon. The new Alon. The Alon that killed his past.

I don’t need nearly this many useless memories, not anymore. If something hurts you, its fine to just remove it entirely…

Goodbye Alon of the past, I pity you but I won’t miss you… It’s my time now…

Time to make all new memories…

 

***

 

I felt myself floating in a familiar monochrome expanse, but this time almost all the black and white that had dueled in this place had become an ever shifting and comforting grey. What little white and black that was present now was calm and seemed to even work together as they mixed and broke apart within the grey. I could feel what this place was now, something that I never would’ve recognized before while I was still clouded by memories of humanity and mortality. This was my mana and unlike the mana in a human’s mana pool my mana was entirely pure.

There was a seemingly endless amount of mana in the expanse inside of me, but I could sense how misleading what I was seeing as an endless expanse really was. I had far less mana now than I did before as a human, the only reason it looked as it did now was that my mana hadn’t even been mastered yet. Right now my mana was all just wild mana that just happened to be generated by my body, I had little to no real control over it as it was now. Even if I could use it though there was so little here that I wouldn’t be able to do anything meaningful with it, once it was gathered and converted into mana I could use I doubted there would even be enough here to fill a midsized bottle.

I had a feeling I shouldn’t try to do anything with this mana inside of me until I was in a place that I could call my home. There was some instinct tickling me to just reach out and devour the mana now, but another equally strong urge was telling me to wait until I was safe and in a place I could call my own. I had the distinct feeling that I would never be able to turn back once I did something to this mana, that there would be a permanent change in me the moment I acted on the mana.

With a thought I woke myself up and left the expanse of mana to return to the world of darkness and silence I had been forced out of when my instincts overcame me and I was sent to some deep recess of my mind. What I found however wasn’t the darkness I was expecting, it was still dark but now it was the sort of darkness that came from being in a place where light couldn’t reach you instead of the blank total darkness that came from not being able to see at all. Better still was the fact that even through this darkness I could perfectly make out the things immediately around me in all directions, it wasn’t exactly like the sight I had grown accustomed to as a human but it seemed better in every conceivable way and I actually preferred this form of sight.

Looking at what was around me I saw that my body had taken on the exact colors of the mana inside me and had been fitted into some kind of necklace of made of fine links of silver metal. What is this material? Silver? Platinum? Wait did it just glow a little, it should be mirthril then… The necklace was surrounded by soft peach colored padding and my first thought was that I must be in some sort of case, but that thought came to an end when I noticed that the padding was rising and falling at a steady rhythm. What made me certain were the two pinkish nubs that where a bit below where I rested, the padding was skin and I was hung around someone’s neck. Someone who judging by the two small hills below me was not a man.

Well this is an interesting place to find myself in… How am I going to free myself from the necklace, get back to Nalia, and still avoid drawing attention to myself if I’m around some woman’s neck? I let out a sigh and was immediately surprised at both the sensation I felt and the sound that I emitted.

“Ann, did you hear something?” I heard a soft feminine voice that was surprisingly young sounding as the chest I was resting in trembled faintly.  

“Yes my lady, it sounded as if someone had just sighed loudly…” I heard another feminine voice, this one older sounding, answer back the first.

Wait, I can emit noises? And I can hear now too? What happened? Why is everything so different now? No, I need to calm down. I can figure this out slowly, I have nothing but time after all, but for now I should be careful. I can’t afford to make any more noises, even by accident, it could draw attention to me and show I’m not just a normal stone. With that sort of attention directed at me and my not having a way to defend myself… I didn’t want to think about the many unpleasant possibilities that I would be likely to face in that sort of scenario. For now I would simply observe, once I had an understanding of the situation I had found myself I could start thinking of ways to get away and reunite with my serpent minion.

That was an advantage to being an immortal stone, I could wait for as long as I needed to…

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A note from AaronDragon

BTW, for anyone who cares my other "I'm commited to this' Project is up now. it's called Night's Saga, and t's basically a fantasy story about a witch born wizard trying to survive the coming apocalypse by building up a village/army of slaves and monsters around his home. Should be a good read, and has already been a fun story to write. I'll be releasing chapters for that off and on as i work on this project, so more chapters for that will be coming soon...

Welp back to writing, i gotta work on the next chapter for this while i still have the time...

AaronDragaon Out...


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AaronDragon

Bio: I am an avid reader, writer, gamer, and otaku and I am proud of that.............

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superloner @superloner ago

So he corrupted the girl without even knowing...

Swordre782 @Swordre782 ago

Thanks, will he and his "kin" as he puts it, meet again?!?

vulcan @vulcan ago

thanks for the chapter

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